Party #12 (Hayes St)

Original Partygoers transcript from the archives:

Party #12 (Hayes St)

John: The red party.

Steve: This was a weird one. We found about this through one of my Hollywood connections.

Will: We were the only ones not wearing red.

Steve: It was a three level party, right?

John: Yeah, it was huge – it must have covered three apartments at least.

Will: It was weird because everybody was wearing red but we weren’t.

Steve: In other words, everyone was in on a joke that we weren’t in on. By this point we weren’t afraid to stand out, though.

John: We were very social. We must have talked with 75% of the people there at some point.

December 19, 2011  Leave a comment

Question of the Day

Hanson and Beck Hansen vs Kriss Kross and Christopher Cross – who wins in a fight?

December 18, 2011  Leave a comment

Breaking News: The Partygoers Celebrate Their 14th Anniversary

We’re pleased to announce that history is being made today: the Partygoers are reuniting in San Francisco in honor of their 14th anniversary.

It was a wintery day in late 1997 when the Goers first formed to fulfill their mission of spreading goodwill through the spontaneous visitation of social gatherings and celebrations (i.e., NOT party crashing). Since then, they have attended exactly 114 parties and made each one better through their special blend of old school technique and new school technology.

It is believed that the Partygoers will once again be pounding the pavement in their beloved Western Addition neighborhood tonight…if you see them, photo-taking is allowed (if from a respectful distance), but please do not interrupt them as they go about their work.

More info:

* Partygoers FAQ

* Tips and tricks for proper partygoing

* History of the Partygoers, Part 1

 

December 17, 2011  Leave a comment

History of the Partygoers: Chapter 2

In their early days, the Partygoers were such a sensation that top scholars and journalists battled over the honor of becoming their official biographer. Eventually, they selected an up-and-coming young writer named Paul Linton Hart for the job. Before he eventually fled the country (last seen living on a houseboat in Amsterdam), Mr. Hart completed 15 chapters and a prologue, the second of which is shared here. Unfortunately, their written story ends in late 2001, but it nonetheless provides a fascinating glimpse into the Goers’ heady rise to glory. Enjoy:

(Be sure to read Chapter 1 first)

The story continues two weeks later on New Year’s Eve. Having realized that they had a responsibility, nay, an obligation to make the City a better, friendlier place the Partygoers, now officially a trio, set out to fulfill their destiny.

1998 was but a few hours old when the Goers stumbled upon and into a bright orange Spanish-style villa that contained the remnants of what had once been a sizable celebration. Using their customary charm, Steve, John, and Will were soon inside, sipping cold beverages provided by the gracious host and offering advice and constructive criticism to the nearby couple in the throes of a serious make-out session. After working their wily magic for a spell, the Partygoers sensed their mission was complete and left as suddenly as they had entered.

Later, as they wandered the streets, the keen collective eye of the Goers spied a small armless figure illuminated by the first rays of the rising sun. Upon closer inspection they realized they had happened upon a rare and precious statue, which they immediately recognized as the Party God. No one is sure if it was the lingering effects of a long night or a genuine religious revelation, but it is believed the Party God spoke the following truth for all to behold: “The Partygoers don’t stop at all the way.”

December 17, 2011  Leave a comment

Freebie Lyrics for Aspiring Rappers

As part of their ongoing effort towards the betterment of the community at large, the Partygoers – the finest white rappers since 3rd Bass – have made available the following lyrics to any aspiring MCs who wish to use them. More lyrics coming soon.

He don’t drink Cristal, but he drinks the Mumms
Then in the morning he eats up some Tums
He ain’t got your whistles but he sure’s got your hums
He fees up your fi’s and fo’s up your fums
His daddy played bass and his mama played drums

December 17, 2011  Leave a comment

Guess What’s In Steve’s Cupboard!

Once again it’s time to Guess What’s in Steve’s Cupboard. Take a look at the picture below, say your answer out loud and click Continue Reading to see if your intuition was correct. Winners will receive a $25 gift certificate good for Partygoers merchandise and memorabilia.

Steve's Cupboard continue reading »

August 30, 2011  Leave a comment

Party #57 (Grove St)

Original Partygoers transcript from the archives:

#57 – Grove St

Will: We had a tip from an anonymous emailer about a party.

Steve: It was out in the Mission.

John: We brought our friend Ali along. He’d been out with us before but had never really successfully visitated a party so we needed to do him right.

Will: He was there that night we tried and failed to visitate that four person party.

Steve: So we go to the Mission, planning to buy 40s once we get there.

Will: In any other neighborhood, that’s not a problem.

Steve: There were no 40s to be found. We walked for blocks.

John: If you’re from the Mission and you come to the W.A., you’ll be able to buy 40s anywhere you want. The 40s are on us.

Will: You can find a 40 in the Marina easier than you can in the Mission.

Steve: Damn!

Will: It had to be said.

John: We’re calling the Mission out. There’s a lot of hype there that needs to be deflated. The house party scene there is dead.

Steve: Totally dead.

Will: We’re just giving some constructive criticism. Maybe if they kept those corner stores open past 9:30 there’d be more parties.

John: Anyway, we had to walk forever to buy 40s and when we finally got to the party it was basically over.

Steve: It was a dud – a bad tip.

John: So we’re stranded in the Mission with Ali, trying to show him what we’re all about, walking all over the place, and we had nothing to show for it.

Steve: Finally we decided to head back to the W.A. and call it an evening.

John: We had no sooner gotten out of the car back at my house when we heard a raging party around the corner.

continue reading »

August 29, 2011  Leave a comment

San Francisco Examiner, 7/15/02

Sadly, this image is the only known evidence of the Goers’ interview with the San Francisco Examiner’s Bill Picture in the summer of 2002. Collectors have made it known that a mint condition copy of the entire article, should it exist, would fetch in the high seven figures.

Since you’ll undoubtedly want to zoom in and enjoy the witty gems served up as the Partygoers tell their tales, click here or on the image below to enlarge.

August 27, 2011  Leave a comment

History of the Partygoers: Chapter 1

In their early days, the Partygoers were such a sensation that top scholars and journalists battled over the honor of becoming their official biographer. Eventually, they selected an up-and-coming young writer named Paul Linton Hart for the job. Before he eventually fled the country (last seen living on a houseboat in Amsterdam), Mr. Hart completed 15 chapters and a prologue, the first of which is shared here. Unfortunately, their written story ends in late 2001, but it nonetheless provides a fascinating glimpse into the Goers’ heady rise to glory. Enjoy:

Chapter 1: In the Beginning…

On a cold, wintry night in late 1997 the Partygoers were born. Our three heroes were enjoying a finely brewed malted beverage at a friend’s apartment, when Will, in the heat of a fever, dropped the words “the Partygoers” on the unsuspecting audience. Nothing much was thought of this at the time.

Later that evening, Steve and John were on their way to visit another friend when, lo and behold, fate intervened in the form of a raucous party that proved too tempting a treat to resist. Meanwhile, Will had been unfortunately detained by an ailing loved one and was unable to participate in what became the first Partygoers episode.

Although technically not invited, Steve and John entered the party with high hopes and a curious eye. Relying only on wit, charm, and their ability to mix the best margaritas in San Francisco, they won over the crowd wholeheartedly. After leaving, they realized they had performed not only a service, but a service that is lacking in their fair City.

August 15, 2011  2 Comments

Freebie Lyrics for Aspiring Rappers

As part of their ongoing effort towards the betterment of the community at large, the Partygoers – the finest white rappers since 3rd Bass – have made available the following lyrics to any aspiring MCs who wish to use them. More lyrics coming soon.

***

Busy like Matlock’s got cases on the docket
Twistin’ up my nipples like Sprockets
Chafed like Sammy’s empty eye socket
And fresh like the suits of Tubbs and Crockett.

***

Let’s walk while we talk about the Upperdecker phenomenon
Sweepin’ across the nation like the bunny goes on and on
It’s stupid like Charley from “Flowers for Algernon”
And sick like the shit from a wooly crested mastadon.

August 14, 2011  Leave a comment

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